Sexy Mes Is Over

It's a little sad that I still get sucked into watching MTV, even in Buenos Aires. What can I say? Despite all the garbage programming, it's inherently watchable garbage. I just have a hard time saying no to a block of "Next" reruns.

Anyways, MTV Latin America publicized February as "Sexy Mes" (Sexy Month). This mostly involved airing endless reruns of the usual MTV dating shows. It also included a series of station promos depicting an animated penis and vagina chasing each other around the screen while the lineup of upcoming shows was announced. I tried and failed to find pictures online, but trust me when I say that it was bizarre.

However, I did find this guy:


Meet Forrito, the star of MTV's new animated series "Sex Police". Originally finding fame in a series of online animated shorts, Forrito is a crime-fighting condom who leads a crack team of special agents. The Sex Police battle sexual irresponsibility, sexual boredom and other problems in the imagined city of Tempation. The show launched a couple weeks ago as a big part of Sexy Mes and currently airs on Saturday and Sunday afternoons throughout Latin America.

Given that my own country increasingly seems like the United States of Prudeville, it's oddly refreshing to see a cartoon like this get such a big push in Latin America. Nevertheless, seeing an animated condom running around is still a little weird.

Keep Indie Alive

Apparently Porteños do like indie music. The Compass party on Fridays at Niceto Club has been extended through March. I haven't yet been able to check out the party myself (soon, I promise), but it's obviously going well enough that another five weeks have been scheduled. Since I first posted about Compass, I've done a little more research and found that the club night is being put together by folks from eh!music and local indie label Indice Virgen. Their pals from Phonorama hold down the back room with "no DJ" sets from journalists, local band members, radio DJs and anyone but the usual contingent of club DJs. On the rare occasion club DJs are invited to spin in the back room, it's only with a promise to steer clear of the sounds and styles they would usually spin.

Live music is also a main component of the party. Next Friday, March 2nd will feature a live performance from local band Brian Storming (who just opened up for Coldplay last week - don't hold that against them). Also scheduled to play in March are Chilean electro-pop chanteuse Javiera Mena, Bicicletas, Los Alamos and Coiffeur. Best of all, The Evens (Ian MacKaye of Fugazi's new band) are performing on March 23rd. As an unbashed fan of all things related to Ian MacKaye and his seminal label Dischord Records, I have that date triple underlined on my calendar.

Let's hope nights like this one and Zizek can help free the Buenos Aires club scene from the stranglehold of punchi-punchi.

Stencil Fun

Buenos Aires is littered with graffiti and stencil art. Old buildings, new buildings, nice neighborhoods, slummy neighborhoods - it's everywhere. Unfortunately, a lot of the graffiti falls under the "messily paint some stupid bullshit no one understands" category. However, one does run across the occasional amazing or at least interesting piece. I'll throw up some mural-style graffiti another time, but today i thought i'd share a few stencils.



The main question I have about this piece is whether or not the word "papa" is supposed to translate as "dad" or "potato". The former would make this some kind of treatise on the cycle of life. The latter would make the whole thing kind of nonsensical. But I do enjoy the thought of someone taking the time to make a stencil that says "Party Party Potato Potato Death".



This translates as: "Your angel is looking for you. Find it." New agey angel mumbo jumbo aside, what I'm really dying to know is why the Motorola logo is included. Is this some weird covert corporate marketing ploy? Does the artist think there are angels in his cell phone? Maybe that the best way to find an angel is to call them up? I'm not sure if I should be confused or scared.

Mar del Plata Is Crowded

Last week I took part in the decades-old Porteño ritual of hauling myself out to the coast to enjoy the beach. After a surprisingly comfortable 6 hour bus ride, we arrived in Mar del Plata, the most popular beach town in Argentina. Have you seen those photos of Coney Island in the 1920's? That's what Mar del Plata was like. This picture was taken on a Tuesday and it hardly shows how insanely crowded it was. Just finding a small square of open sand was a challenge.

Nevertheless, there was real sand and surf along with all the other usual beach sights and sounds. One very bright spot was the excellent and decidedly un-touristy La Cuadrada restaurant. A definite lowlight happened when our hotel informed us that their advertised pool was actually located 6 blocks away from the hotel. After awkwardly walking through the most bustling part of Mar del Plata in our swimsuits and towels (at night), we found that the pool was actually part of a local health club. To top it all off, only lap swim was allowed and everyone was required to wear a swim cap. We didn't stick around.

So now that I'm back in Buenos Aires, I'm happily taking part in another long-standing Porteño tradition - complaining about Mar del Plata.

Umm....

No, I don't hate gay people. No, I haven't started admiring British slang. Yes, this is immature. But it's also funny in that "foreigners have no idea how offensive this would be in my home country" sort of way. In case you're wondering, this photo was snapped during a bus ride to Mar del Plata. I believe it was some kind of auto repair shop. Maybe a gay auto repair shop? Okay, probably not.

Soccer Snack Shortage

On Sunday I attended my first soccer game in Argentina. Yes, I know it's called fútbol around here. No, I'm not going to stop saying soccer for the sake of political correctness.

We went to see local team River Plate take on Lanús at Estadio Monumental in Belgrano. It was a great experience, especially observing the local soccer insanity first-hand. The team colors, the banners and especially the spontaneous singing created an atmosphere unlike any other sporting event I've attended. How do the fans know when to start singing? Or which song to sing at what time? Just the volume of the crowd is astonishing and the energy emanating from the popular section is extremely infectious.

However, there was a complete lack of snack selection. For some reason I had imagined that some kind of Argentinian snack smorgasbord would be available. I was wrong. For most of the game, only two items were available - shitty hamburgers and Cokes. During halftime one booth in our section started selling panchos (hot dogs) for about 15 minutes until he ran out. Throughout the game some vendors did walk through the crowd offering either ice cream or coffee, but their appearance was sporadic. Where were the delicious choripans (sausage sandwiches)?



Maybe I have some kind of crass American commercialism ingrained in my psyche, but where the fuck were the snacks and refreshments? I don't even drink, but I was shocked that beer wasn't served. (I know there's a risk of soccer-related violence, but a complete ban? Wow.) How about water? Or another soda besides Coca-Cola? Oddly enough, there actually was a giant snack selection available - after the game. As we excited the stadium we passed an endless array of booths and street vendors selling all kinds of tasty confections. Why weren't these things available inside the stadium during the game?

In case you're wondering, River actually won 1-0 on a last-minute goal during stoppage time in the 2nd period. Maybe if I had been able to eat a choripan during the game I would have had even more enjoy to jump up and down with glee when the team won.

Although I don't want to jump in the middle of a decades-old rivalry, maybe the Boca Juniors (the other Buenos Aires team) have better snacks. After all, Maradona sure likes to eat.

Buenos Aires Is Indie

Perhaps my grumbling about the lack of indie rock in Buenos Aires was a tad premature. Apparently Fridays are about to get a lot more hipster-friendly because Compass is back at Niceto Club. The flyer claims that every Friday night will feature bands playing live along with the DJ stylings of Fabian Dellamónica, DJs Pareja and the Phonorama crew in the back room. They're promising to play stuff like The Rapture, Bloc Party, The Strokes, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, LCD Soundsystem, The Knife, CSS, Le Tigre and all the other bands one would hear at the average "indie" club night in the United States and Europe.

I wonder if this will work. Only February 16th and 23rd are listed on the flyer so maybe this is just a trial run. I went to the last Compass party in January when Erland Oye from Kings of Convenience played live. Niceto was packed but no one was dancing to the Sufjan Stevens and Belle and Sebastian records the DJs threw on before Erland's set. I didn't stick around after he was done so maybe the dance floor got moving in the wee hours.

Obviously parties like Zizek have been successful putting new and undergorund sounds on display, but Niceto Club is a very big place. I'm not sure if a city where punchi-punchi reigns supreme is ready for a club night that lists Cocorosie and Calexico on the flyer. I love those bands but I sure as hell couldn't get kids to dance to that stuff.

Did You Know Buenos Aires Is the Greatest City Ever?

Well it is. This picture could be your new life. Don't you believe everything you read?

Over the past year, a surprising number of major newspapers and magazines have published articles describing Buenos Aires as pretty much the most wonderful place in the history of the universe. Oh, you haven't heard? It's the Paris of South America! There's tango! And beef! And it's so cheap! Why aren't you in Buenos Aires already? What are you, a fucking idiot?

After all, according to the Washington Post expatriates can easily shed their expensive, high stress lifestyles in the United States and enjoy the "low-cost, high-culture" lifestyle of Buenos Aires. New York Magazine wants you to know that pretty much any schlub with a little money can drop everything back home, move to Buenos Aires, become coolest guy in town and party with models all day. Newsweek reports that the coolest people from around the globe are moving here and revitalizing the art and music scene.

Even our pals at the New York Times have a major hard on for Buenos Aires. They absolutely can not stop writing about the food, the nightlife, the culture, and the prices. Have I mentioned that it's cheap?

I've been in Buenos Aires for two months now. I like it here. Really I do. But the notion that Buenos Aires is some kind of expatriate shangri-la is somewhat ridiculous. Buenos Aires is a lovely city, but has warts that many of these articles like to ignore. Pollution, traffic, insane drivers, bland food, inferior or nonexistent ethnic food, dog shit on the streets, mosquitoes, slow service, poor service, difficult bureaucrats and inefficient business practices are just some of the common expat complaints. And where are the villas (shanty towns) in all the sparkling descriptions of Buenos Aires? That's right, a significant portion of the population here is mired in poverty.

Perhaps the most glaring omission has to do with money. Sure, Buenos Aires is relatively cheap for Americans and Europeans. But unless a person is ridiculously wealthy, the fantasy lifestyle described by these articles is exactly that - a fantasy. Sure, it's all relaxation, art, music and good food when someone is living off their savings and soaking up the Buenos Aires good life. But try to actually live here as a regular (working) adult and things get much more difficult. Finding a job ranges from difficult to impossible. Thinking of procuring a work visa? Good luck finding an Argentinian company willing to sponsor you and deal with the hassle. Most openings for English speakers are in one of two fields - teaching English or recruiting for foreign corporations. Teaching English has extremely low pay (usually about $5 an hour) and inconsistent schedules. Working for a big foreign company pays better, but only by serving as part of the global outsourcing cycle.

Hypocrisy alert: I'm currently living in Buenos Aires off my savings. I have no job, save for scattered DJ gigs I've been picking up (which also pay much lower than the ones I used to get in the United States). It's fun. I do not miss getting up and going to work every day. Not even a little bit. But I'm also not espousing Buenos Aires propaganda to the masses. The exploitative subtext of these articles is gross. Why respected newspapers and magazines would report on a foreign city on the rise with a growing/thriving art and culture scene is no surprise. But the fact that's it's often done in a misleading fashion that appeals to carpetbagging impulses is completely irresponsible.

To be fair, not all the coverage so ridiculous. There are a number of blogs and online resources where much more realistic descriptions and accounts can be found. Buenos Aires really is a wonderful place to be, but I just hope that anyone entranced by these articles would dig a little deeper before coming coming here to enjoy some kind of beef/tango/hot model fantasyland. The real Buenos Aires is quite good on its own and doesn't need to be puffed up by disingenuous articles and unrealistic expectations.

Anyways, if these journalists really want to hype Buenos Aires, they should mention the helado (ice cream). It's amazing.

I Miss Oakland

Mistah F.A.B. - "Ghost Ride It"


Oakland is the best.

The Only Argentinian Musician I Knew

Meet Juana Molina.

Before I moved to Buenos Aires, this 45 year old former comedienne was pretty much responsible for the sum total of my Argentinian music knowledge. Looking back, I'm not entirely sure how that's even possible. As a long-time DJ at KALX in Berkeley, I constantly came across music from around the globe. To be fair, I've never been much of a "world music" guy. Most "world music" panders to middle-aged white urbanites who fancy themselves to be "citizens of the world" because they take international vacations, eat Thai food twice a week and purchase music from the Putumayo catalog. Nevermind that most "world music" often only highlights traditional music and reinforces the notion of the 3rd world as an undeveloped tribal backwater.

Before a full-on rant ensues, let me say that although I generally detest "world music", I do make an effort to check out modern sounds and trends from abroad. From Spanish indiepop to Chinese punk to Brazilian baile funk, I've found and enjoyed plenty of foreign music. However, Argentina has barely registered on the musical radar. Prior to my arrival in Buenos Aires, I couldn't name one Argentinian singer, band or musical act of any kind besides Juana Molina.

Oddly enough, the music of Juana Molina isn't all that famous in Argentina. Most Argentinians are surprised when I tell them she's the only artist I know. She's best remembered in her homeland as a goofy sketch comedy actress from the late 80s and early 90s. Sure, they're aware that she makes music now but she's no platinum recording artist, even by modest Argentinian standards (scroll down). She's no superstar in the United States and Europe either, but at least her work has been showered with praise. The New York Times named her second album Tres Cosas one of the top 10 pop albums of 2004. She's found a home on Domino Records and toured with artists like David Byrne, Jose Gonzalez and Psapp. That's quite a contrast from the inital reaction in Argentina. An October 2006 New York Times article describes some pretty brutal treatment:

"The apathy or even hostility of the crowds was terrible, with people walking out all the time,” recalled Fernando Kabusacki, a guitarist who accompanied Ms. Molina through 2003. “They would tell her to go back to comedy, and backstage afterwards she would be in tears.”

However, her homeland seems to be slowly coming around. Last night Ms. Molina headlined one of the many free concerts put on by the city of Buenos Aires this summer. There were easily a couple thousand people in attendance and Juana remarked during the show that it was the largest audience she had ever played for in Argentina. With an audience largely consisting of teens and twentysomethings, perhaps it's those Argentinians too young to remember her zany comedy exploits who can best enjoy her music. Listen for yourself.

Juana Molina - "Micael"
Juana Molina - "Tres Cosas"

Thankfully, now that I'm here I can enjoy Juana Molina AND find some new Argentinian music to champion.